Develop Your Assertiveness 6

Listening

There is no point in talking,however assertively, if no one is listening and,conversely,no point in listening if we are not truly attentive to the other person.analysing the content of their communication and assessing how their tone of voice,mannerisms,facial expressions and so on,add meaning to the words they use.

Think back to everyone's basic rights discussed in Chapter 4.

How can you show respect for another person if you do not give them your full attention- actively listen to them - hearing out rather than impatiently waiting for your turn to talk.Don't you expect the same of others - to be listened to and taken seriously?Yet I'm sure you'll agree that few people have good listening skills.It's all too easy to switch off and become distracted by our own concerns or thoughts about what we're going to do next.

One reason for including a chapter on listening here is because of concerns expressed by people attending assertiveness courses,many of which are helped by improved listening skills.For example, non-assertive people who are shy or lacking in confidence often find it difficult to begin conversations with others,especially on social occasions where they feel they have no aptitude for small talk.

CONFIDENCE IS LIFE.

THE ONLY WAY TO COME UP IN LIFE IS CONFIDENCE.